GiST #5

This whole finding things to be thankful for is harder than it looks, especially these last few months. I feel very much like I'm stuck in some hell dimension, where everyone around me is sick and needy, and they are sucking the life right out of me. Frances, Ian, and now Mary...it's just never ending. In better news, Frances has been referred to a pediatric allergist in Saskatoon for her constant sicks. I just spoke to the receptionist and we have an appointment booked for April 15th. Also, I finally made an appointment with the family doctor for the terrible gastrointestinal issues which have been plaguing me for months, but I've not had time to worry about because I've been so busy caring for others.

I'm not even going to go into the terrible money problems we are having right now, other than to say that I don't know how people do it, and I don't know what we are going to do or how we are going to carry on this way. I could get a job, but because I have no education beyond high school, the best I can hope for is a low paying retail job. As I learned in the fall, I'm unlikely to find something that will make it worth my while after paying for daycare and gasoline to get too and from work. If I'm going to work, which is something I don't want to do in the first place, it's going to have to be worth it. I'll need to bring in at least as much as we get in our child tax benefit (which I'll lose when I start working) after paying for daycare and gas. Huh. I guess I did go into it a little bit after all.

Last night I went to my first punk rock concert! It was quite an enjoyable experience, though I have absolutely no voice this morning.

On to my Grace in Small Things:

1. The fact that we have a medical system in this country where I can take my sick children to the doctor without worrying about going bankrupt.

2. The fact that anyone in this country can do the above.

3. Scottish Punk Rockers with pierced nipples, tattoo's, bagpipes and kilts.

4. The snowman named Walter melting away in my front yard, and my husband and daughters pride at successfully making their first ever snowman.

5. The thick ice fog that just appears in the evenings, blanketing everything with white, muffling sounds, and leaving a beautiful thick frost on the trees in the morning.

GiST #4

I had a bizarre dream last night about my family and a friend of mine. It was strange, because usually in my dreams I either don't have children and a husband, or if I do have them, they're far away in the dream. I very rarely dream in the detail that I had last night either unless I'm pregnant (I'm not). Anyways, I emailed the dream first thing in the morning to my friend, and he had an interesting idea about the dream which I hadn't thought of, but in hindsight makes a pile of sense.

At the rink yesterday, a child came up to me, she was about 10 years old. She asked me why my hair was so pink, and I told her it was because I don't eat my veggies. Her brow furrowed as her Mum laughed behind her, and finally, she looked at me and said with great intensity "But....what does that mean??"

I made banana chocolate chip pancakes for lunch today. Yum.

On to my Grace in Small Things:

1) Overripe bananas.
2) Crock Pots.
3) Strong winds bringing warm weather.
4) An insightful friend.
5) A cup of hot tea waiting for me in the morning.