All By Myself...

We got up bright and early this morning to take Moustapha to the airport, all that is left to remind me of his visit is his dirty laundry on the floor, and a huge pile of dirty dishes on the counter. Sigh. Mary bawled like crazy when we left the airport, she kept looking back and sobbing. It was pretty sad, but she fell asleep on the drive home and when she woke up she was fine.

Speaking of Mary, this morning when she got up she managed to get one foot on top of the rail of her crib. What is up with that? Does this mean that I need to get her into a "big girl bed?" Cause I don't want too. I thought that I would have till she was at least two till I needed to worry about her climbing out of her crib, damn it.

The weather is finally lovely and sunny today, so Mary and I hung out in the front yard this morning after sending Daddy off. She is so funny and busy, and crazy smart. She has two balls now, a smallish finding nemo ball, and a giant hot pink one. She keeps trying to stack them on top of eachother, and she wants to have control of both of them at all times, she she holds the littler one between her hand and her chin, and she pushes the big one around with her free hand. I'll have to take a picture this afternoon, it's the funniest thing I've seen in a while.

It was nice to have Moustapha around for a while, but I have to say that I was almost (I said almost, that doesnt mean that I actually was) relieved to see him go. It's getting harder and harder for me every time he comes home. I have a routine, I'm used to things being a certain way, and he really messes with that. I also had a hard time with Mary while he was here. I'm used to being the only one that she hugs and cuddles, and after about the tenth time she rejected me, screaming in rage, only to cuddle with him, my feelings were really hurting. I know that maybe it's petty of me and I really don't mind that she loves her Daddy, but for crying out loud. I spend 24 hours a day for two months being her sole caregiver, staying at home at night, feeding her, cuddling her, changing her diapers, putting up with her temper tantrums...why does she have to love him so much more than me? (Yes, I know I'm being unreasonable, but my feelings are still wounded).

Sorry

Dear Internet, I am very sorry I have been such a lollyblogger lately. I've been busy, I'm sure you understand. Moustapha has been home, and we have been having fun playing with the baby and eachother.

The last week has absolutely flown by, we've barely had a quiet moment. Moustapha didn't get home till midnight on friday evening, and by time he made it through customs, it was after 1 AM. Mary had refused to sleep at all that night, and by time we got home she was pretty damned exhausted. She woke up early on Saturday though, at around 8. We kept busy through the week, visiting friends and doing other things.

Friday night was Purgatory, the long anticipated Saturnalia. The game was an absolute blast, lots was going on. My twisted character was up to all kinds of no good, and the night was extremely successful for my evil doings. After the game, we went out with the crowd, and I stayed out past midnight. I stayed out till 2AM! With adult friends! and beer! It was fun. Saturday morning came far too early.

Moustapha is still here, and we have no idea when he leaves for his next job in Washington State, but I suspect it will be tomorrow or Tuesday at the latest. I'm sure they will give us a couple hours notice anyways.

So, that's where I've been. I'm sure I will be blogging with regularity again once my Sweet Baboo leaves. Wait for me!

Friday Baby Blogging

 

Hello all! Sorry for the light blogging of late, I've been busy getting re-acquainted with my husband. He'll be leaving in a few days, so things should get back to normal around here soon enough.

Here is a picture of Mary enjoying the sunshine on Monday, before it started raining. When will it stop raining? 

My Week

Monday: "Yay! Moustapha is going to be home by the end of this week! Yay!"

Tuesday: A very sad phone call from Puerto Rico, advising me that no, he will not be home this week, but he is trying his hardest to get home next week some time. I was annoyed, and unhappy.

Wednesday: Another sad phone call, assuring me that he is doing his best to ensure that he will be home on monday.

Thursday: An MSN conversation which started with Moustapha saying "You're totally going to have a cow." A word of advice, never, ever start a conversation with those words. It's a sure fire way to get me worked up before the bad news even arrives, and when the bad news does drop...well...just don't do it. Anyways. It turns out that he will be home Friday. That's TODAY!

Friday: Frantic procrastination. Wandering around the house looking at various messes and whimpering. More procrastination. Shuffling junk from one pile to another, and whimpering. Even more procrastination. His flight gets in tonight at midnight, so I have twelve hours. eep.

Random Stuff

I hate the DaVinci Code. Why on earth is everyone so excited about it? It was a terrible book, with nothing new to say. If I see one more news special about "Decoding DaVinci," or discussing the "New and controversial claims" in that damned book, I'm going to scream! There is absolutely nothing new in that book, and it's dead boring.

Mary officially has a bad skin infection, damn it. Her eczema got out of control, and I ended up spending 70 dollars on various prescription creams to try to solve the problem today.

The Grey's Anatomy season finale was last night. Now what am I going to do Sunday Evenings? How will I survive without my weekly sob-fest?

Moustapha may not be home this week. Crap. Crap crap crap.

Dooce was discussing the different ways of saying the word Crayon (cray-on vs. cran vs. crown) on her blog, and it got me thinking. I know that I say some things differently (correctly). I say cray-on, but I also say yaw-gurt as opposed to yow-gurt, to-mah-to as opposed to to-may-to, priv-acy, as opposed to preye-vacy, krik instead of creek (which I admit may be a Saskatchewanism). My crazy east coast husband says all sorts of things wrong. For example he says tore instead of tou-er, and Kahrrr instead of car.

They ripped up the sidewalk in front of my house, put up "Sidewalk Closed" signs, and seem to have abandoned the job. The guys have not been back yet since Thursday morning. What's up with that?

My character for the Tuesday night D&D game died (not really, but because of a stupid decision on my part is out of the game). I had to make a new character. I hate making characters with a hot hot heat. And no character is going to be as cool as a halfling bard named Dewberry Tealeaf.

A cat, not mine, disemboweled a bird, and left the remains on my front step. Again, what's up with that?

Happy Mothers Day

Hey, did you know it's mothers day today? I sure didn't, not until Goody commented on my last post. It's hard to keep track of these things, I'm generally proud of myself if I can figure out what day of the week it is, and even if I'm only a day off it's a cause for celebration! I did manage to get cards off to my Mother, Grandma, Step-Mother and Mother in Law last week, but after that, I completely forgot about it. With just Mary and I, there won't be much of a celebration, mind you...I've been telling her all morning that she has to be an extra good girl for me today, but after preventing her from climbing the bookshelf for a third time I just don't think it's going to happen. I am going over to visit Anne R. Key and the Dauntless Janet for cheesecake this afternoon, so I will consider that my mothers day celebration.

Moustapha gets home this week some time, Thursday or Friday at the latest. He should be home for 10 days this time around, which will be nice, so long as he doesn't drive me crazy. I really miss him, and I know he will be amazed to see Mary again. I have so much to do around the house to convince him that I don't live in filth while he is away...the next few days are going to be full of procrastination!

Pointless

I am so tired. I don't really have a point, so I imagine I'll just type out some rambling nonsense, and get back to my napless existence.

Have you heard of the Doodlebops? They are a children's "rock band"/tv show that Mary now watches every morning. Three grown adults dressed up, dancing and singing some very catchy tunes. Mary is so fascinated by them that she doesn't even dance to their songs, she just stares at the tv, absolutely hypnotized, for the entire 20 minutes that the show is on. Oh, and I can't get their songs out of my head.

So. They are replacing the sidewalks out front of my house. That's a very good thing, it's needed doing for a long time. The not so good thing is that they start working at 6:30 in the morning. Why, oh why, would you start noisily ripping up asphalt and driving your truck backwards so it beep beep beeps constantly in a residential neighbourhood at six in the bloody morning?

I still haven't found nap time. Hopefully it'll appear around noon today.

I do have things that are a wee bit more intelligent that I want to type about, but until naptime comes back, the only time I have to blog is the twenty minutes the Doodlebops are on.

Naptime. Where Did It Go?

If you see it, please let me know, or return it too me. I need it. That is all for now.

Breaking News: Ralph Klein is Not a Gay Basher

In the news tonight Ralph Klein said "Look, I don't want people to think that I'm a gay basher, because I'm not." Really. Interesting. He just doesn't like homosexuals, and refuses to marry them, and is willing to challenge the Charter of Rights and Freedoms to prevent it. But he's not a gay basher, he just doesn't like them gays is all.

Why I Need New Friends

Now, please don't think that I'm saying I need to replace my old friends, that's not true. I love them all. That being said, I need new friends in addition to the old ones. I feel like I'm growing further and further away from my friends, and it's not entirely their fault. Before I had the baby, I could go out whenever. I could go to fancy restaurants, out to the bar, to a movie and dinner. Now, not so much. I don't expect my friends lives to change because mine had, but I had kind of hoped that there would still be a place for me in that world, but I'm learning that the older and more dificult that Mary gets, the smaller my place in that world is. It is getting rarer and rarer the times that I can bring her out, the times that there is a baby friendly thing going on, the times where I actually feel comfortable bringing her out. I'm kind of being forced to come to terms with this a little more often these days, without Ian around, it's harder and harder (read: next to impossible) for me to go places without the baby. I was feeling sorry for myself this afternoon and I realized that it's kind of my fault. I mean, I know people with kids, but I've not really strengthened those relationships, you know? I've never really been good at forging close relationships with people. To be honest, even among my group of friends now, I can count the number of people who I would be comfortable calling up for help or company on half a hand, and even then, it would take a good deal of bad stuff to make me actually pick up the phone and call.

Anyways, on to other stuff....Did you watch Grey's Anatomy tonight? I bawled like a baby. Seriously, between the angst of my Fallen Angels game last night, and the weeping from that show tonight, I'm feeling a wee bit emotionally drained.

Hey! It looks like Moustapha will be home soon, probably within the next two weeks or so! Yay! I can't wait to have him home so we can...ah...well...reacquaint ourselves with eachother.

Not Much To Say

Really, I havn't got much at all to say. Life has been pretty boring these days.

I've solved Marys bath problem, I just have to get in with her at first, splash around a little, and then she relaxes. I actually had to drag her out of the tub yesterday, she was having so much fun. Yay! She's still not eating though. Damn it.

Last night Mary and I went out for supper with some friends, I was so proud of her. She reduced a table of 6 adults to tears we were laughing so hard. She kept trying to grab the lemon from my iced tea...so...I gave it too her. The faces were incredible.

Huh. Not much else to talk about. I havn't even been taking pictures of Mary lately, so I don't have anything to post for Friday Baby Blogging.

Oh! I know what I can talk about...Have you heard the latest news from Puerto Rico? It seems that a few days ago the government there ran out of money. Thats right. The Puerto Rican government has no money. All government offices are closed, schools are closed, everyone but nurses and policia are out of work apparantly. On top of that, some dude, Moustapha wasn't sure who he is, decided that he's now in charge of the country. Yup, he just stepped up and said "I'm in charge." Now, I don't know about you, but that sounds like an extremely scary situation to be in, and I really want my husband to be far far away from there, very very soon. I have said since I came back from there that the island of Puerto Rico is ripe for a very nasty revolution, and if anything is going to push them over the edge...well, I'd say this is it.

Anyways, hopefully something exciting, or at least moderately entertaining will happen this weekend so I have more to talk about next week.

Sleep Is For The Weak

 

It's been a while since I blogged, I know. I had written up a post, but accidentally x'ed out of the screen before I posted it. Stupid.

Anyways, Purgatory was this Friday past and as expected, it was fantastic. I've posted this picture, cause I know a couple of people wanted to see my costume. This is my charcter and a Marxist named Mr. Arkhaus having a discussion. Arkhaus is incredibly passionate, and always shaking his fist in the air. Unfortunately for him, where he isn't met with outright resistance, he tends to run into just plain apathy (he tends to remind me of you, Goody, is that bad?).

Mary is doing...well...I guess. Actually, I don't really know what to do with her. She hates bathing, and absolutely freaks out in the tub. She's clearly terrified, but she has to bathe. I just don't understand why she's suddenly so scared. Sigh. Also, she's still incredibly fussy when it comes to eating, worse than usual these days. Oh, and did I mention the grinding of teeth? It's started up again, worse than before because she now has a mouth full of teeth to grind. It drives me crazy. And the there is the temper tantrums. Jesus. Today she flipped out for no reason that I could discern, and smashed me so hard in the face that my tooth went into my lower lip. It took all my willpower not to heave her across the room when that happened.

I thought that getting away would make things easier, but if anything, I'm having a harder time now. I miss Ian, I miss the weather, I miss the music, I miss the freedom of being able to go out after 7 at night. I want to be able to run up to the store for a slurpee at 10 in the evening. I want to get out of the house. I want to talk to people who can actually talk back. I want to socialize, I want to take a class. Sigh. I love Mary, and I love being a Mum, I really do...but I'm so tired of doing it all alone. I'm tired of feeling guilty when I go out with my group of friends and have to bring Mary along. I'm tired of turning every invitation to go out down, because I'm alone with the baby. I'm just...tired (and apparantly feeling very sorry for myself).