A cry for help...

 


This is what I have been putting up with All. Day. Long. The screaming. The pounding headache. The backache from picking her up, then putting her down because that's what she wants, then picking her up again, then putting her down, then the screaming, oh the screaming...and picking her up.

Since she woke up at 8 this morning, it's been nothing but absolute misery, except for the 45 minute nap she took this morning, and the last 10 minutes of napping right now. Please, God, let this nap last longer than 30 minutes. Please, God, let the screaming not start up again when she wakes. 

How Odd...

Check this out. I really don't know what to say. It's interesting...but...odd.

The Failure of Feminism

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

Anarchy!

The government has fallen! There's rioting in the streets! Cars are burning, windows smashed...I'm going to go out looting with Mary later on today!

Not really. The government has been disolved thanks to the manouvering of some seriously unlikely bedfellows in Canadian politics. Who would have thought that the Tories, the Pinko NDP (as my father calls them) and the Seperatists would get together and agree on anything. To be honest, the whole thing leaves a bad taste in my mouth. We will be having an election in January (great idea guys! Lets have an election at the time of year when you can get frostbite from being outside for half a second. That'll help with voter turn-out!) and I suspect the outcome won't be much different than the government that was just disolved. So, we the taxpayers will be paying millions of dollars for an election that we don't want, don't need, and won't change anything. Yay.

You know, I've always been a supporter of the NDP, but after this little display with the Tories...I just don't know if I can stomach supporting them any more. My biggest fear is that we will end up with the Conservatives in power, and then we will have that evil robot for a Prime Minister (look at a picture of Stephen Harper, and you'll understand).

In other news...um. Well, not alot is going on here, life as usual. Mary slept from 8 last night to 10 this morning. The Christmas tree has not been knocked over yet. It's snowing out...poor Ian, working outside. Mary and I start to volunteer with the Salvation Army on Thursday. Hmm. That's really all I can think of right now.

Personal Space

Saturday I had the very best of intentions. I would clean the house, go grocery shopping, cook a good supper and get the laundry done before we headed over to T's place for some D&D. Well, we all know where good intentions get us. Ian and I ended up spending the whole day at Ikea. How fun! We bought a couple of christmas decorations and some candles. After Ikea, we popped over at V&I's place to pick up our Christmas tree. We put it up and put the lights on it before packing up the baby and heading out for a very enjoyable evening of D&D. We got home around 2, and because I was not at all tired, I decided to finish decorating the tree. It's early, I know, but I'm hosting a get together and cookie exchange on the 10th, and I really need to get my act together and decorate the house.

Yesterday Ian and I decided that we would go out for breakfast to our favorite restaurant before we headed over to G & K's place to watch the Grey Cup. It was all in all a very nice experience. When we got to the restaurant there was a little boy, a couple of months older than Mary, who absolutely adored her. He came marching up to us and had a lot to say to her, it was very cute. Mary however is not interested in boys at this time, and she just stared at him in confusion till his dad came and took him away. As we were finishing up, an older lady came up, commented on what a pretty baby we had, and proceded to grope Marys head without so much as a by-your-leave. Wow. I was awfully angry, and Mary started to scream bloody murder. What is it about babies that makes people forget basic rules of etiquitte? I mean, you wouldn't go up to anyone else in a restaurant and start rubbing them all over, would you? Babies have personal space too, and really ought to be respected. Anyways, our breakfast was cut short because we didn't want to subject the other diners to the inconsolable screaming. Luckily we had finished eating, and were just trying to enjoy our tea and digest our food a little bit.

The Grey Cup was fabulous, Edmonton won, of course. Next year will be Saskatchewans turn, I'm sure of it!

Friday Baby Blogging

"Holy crap, there's a cat in my bed!"

I'm Back!

Oh dearest internet, how I missed thee. A whole week without you nearly did me in, I swear.

So, last Wednesday, we all got up bright and early so that Mary and I could start our journey west. I had everything packed up already, so it was basically just a wake up and go sort of operation. Ian seems to think that he can get anywhere from anywhere in just 20 minutes, so we very nearly missed our plane. Yikes. We did in fact miss the pre-boarding call. We got on the plane just in time, and Mary promptly fell asleep. What a good girl. The plane landed in Calgary, and Mary continued to sleep through the bumpy landing, and the trip to the actual terminal. We didn't need to change planes, so we just sat there, Mary drooling all over me and snoring softly as most people got off the plane, and more got on for the trip to Abbotsford. We were in the window seat, and a smartly dressed businessman got on the plane and sat in our row in the aisle (When traveling with infants, the airline does their damndest to keep the seat directly beside you open). Mary woke up. Mary yelled, and squirmed. We got some applejuice which shut her up, and after we finished the juice she had a nice plastic cup to play with. She threw the (empty)cup at the businessman, and hit the screen of his laptop. He moved to another seat.

We arrived in Abbotsford at around 9ish, and it was a grey and gloomy day. Mary and I got settled and hung out with Mum and Larry for a while, and then Larry had to go to work. Mum and I went for a walk with the baby around her neighbourhood and into town. What a beautiful place! Mum lives in a little neighbourhood, about 5 houses clumped together, about a 10 minute walk from Aldergrove. It's odd, the whole place is very rural, they are mostly surrounded by acerages, but the big city is moving out there, so you'll be walking down a country road, and all of a sudden there will be a street or two of cookie cutter brand new houses, all crammed close together, and all looking exactly the same.

Wednesday night Mary went to sleep at her usual time, woke up around 1:30 in the morning for a bottle, which I expected. What I didnt expect was for her to go back to sleep for about 20 minutes, and then wake up screaming. Screaming screaming screaming for about 2 hours. Nothing I could do would calm her down. This was pretty much how every night went, she would wake up, eat, pretend to go to sleep, and then cry for at least 45 minutes, sometimes all night.

Anyways, here are the highlights of my trip:

Saturday I went over to my uncle's place to visit him, his wife, my cousins and their kids. Uncle lives in a fabulous house right in Vancouver, west of Marine Drive. I'm sure their house would sell for over a million dollars now, and unlike a lot of houses there, I think that it would be worth every penny. It was wonderful to spend time with everyone, the little girls all adored Mary and packed her around the house. The littlest one, Zac is only a month younger than Mary, and very cute. I wish that I could be closer to them, so we could get together more often.

Saturday I went in the truck with Larry. He picks up flowers from various growers in the Fraser valley and takes them to the auction to be sold to the people who sell them to you. It was a blast, and the countryside there is so stunning.

Monday I saw my little brother, and his neat little bachelor pad right in downtown Vancouver. It was foggy and gross in Vancouver, even though the sun was shining in Abbotsford, but we had a lot of fun walking around. We went to Granville Market, and then over to Lonsdale Quay.

Tuesday I saw my miserable old Grandma. You know, the one who told me I was fat about 30 seconds before I walked down the aisle for my wedding. Nice. She is in pretty rough shape though. She has arthritis, and it is really quite awful. They haven't found any treatments that work, so she is in constant pain. She is so stubborn and proud though, she refuses to ask for help, or to even get a handicap pass for her car.

Wednesday was a travel day, and it was a doozie. When we got to the airport we found that the flight had been delayed an hour, and they kept moving it back every time I looked. An hour and a half after we were supposed to leave, the plane finally got off the ground. Mary was miserable and loud the entire way to Calgary, where we changed planes. The flight from Calgary to Edmonton was the worst though, she screamed bloody murder the entire way home. Yikes.

I'll not bitch about my husband (much) but I'm not terribly pleased about what greeted me when I walked into my house. Needless to say, the house is a filthy pigsty. After a long miserable day of travel, it would have been nice to come home to a relatively clean home. Oh well, he does work hard so I don't have to, I guess.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Well, tomorrow Mary and I are getting up before the crack of dawn and getting on an airplane full of business men. We are flying to Vancouver to visit my Mum, brother, grandma, and a whole bunch of my cousins, aunts and uncles. I am extremely excited, it has been way too long since I visited the city of my birth, and my favorite city in the country (followed closely by Halifax). I'm also very nervous. Mary and I have flown before, and she was an angel, she slept the whole way to Regina. But this time is different. For one, both Mary and I are late sleepers. She usually does not get up for the day till after 9, and tomorrow we need to be on the road to the airport by 5:30. Ick. I'm sure she will sleep through the trip, but I am concerned that it will throw her schedule right off, she has a hard enough time with travelling as it is. It wouldn't be so bad if I could put her to bed early tonight, but unfortunately I am babysitting late, and we won't be home till 9ish. Mary refuses to nap when I'm babysitting too, so she is going to be exhausted and miserable by time we get home, and she will need a whole night's sleep. Eek. I'm getting myself more and more worked up just thinking about it. At least she seems to be taking a break from teething. Last week 3 teeth popped up in less than 24 hours. Oh God, now I've jinxed myself, haven't I?

Anyways, I will be in rainy Vancouver for the next week, and my Mum does not believe in computers, so I won't be able to update my blog at all, or read anyone else's. So, no posts for a week, I'm not lollyblogging, just having fun on the West Coast. Whee!

Getting To Know Me Questionnaire for The Winter Holiday of Your Choice Blog Bonanza

Here it is, the survey for the gift exchange. So much fun!


If I could get away with it, I'd steal Anne R. Key's Creativity and abillity to write coherently, because damn it, it should be mine.

I sometimes buy Tattoo's (I know, please don't mock me) magazine, because I lust after a new tattoo for my leg.

If you came over to my house to play and broke my Purple crayon, I'd be a little bit mad at you forever.

The colour orange should only be used in fungal remedy packaging or if human waste were to be redesigned.

The colour green, any shade of green makes my heart feel like it is full of happy kittens frolicking in a sunny, grassy meadow.

The Hippity Hop Music makes me break out in gooberous pustules (or else I just don't like it, but I'm too nice to say it.)

Clowns and the dentist give me the heebie jeebies and I might need to seek therapy if I even think about it further.

I love the feel of my cats fur so much I have a primitive urge to stick some down my pants (not really).

No one should have to watch me eat Creme Brulee, because really If I were eating some in private, I'd be quite a pig about it.

I would rather chew tinfoil and shave my head with a cheese grater than eat green peppers or olives.

I DO follow recipes because I'm anal that way.

For Marla, "White Shoulders" perfume will always smell like her laid-out dead grandmother. I feel that way about _________________________.

If I could, I'd perfume my own farts and those of my loved ones with the scent of Vanilla.

I have TOO MUCH useless junk, I'm such a pack rat, and not enough books, never enough books.

Gadgets are for weirdo's.

When people have kind, sweet and nice things about me, they're usually talking about I can't think of anything. I guess they're talking about how gosh darned humble I am.

I can't be upset if people dis me about over-reacting to things, because it's true.

If I could have any talent in the world, I'd choose the ability to write and use it to write childrens stories.



You are given an hour and twenty dollars to spend in one of these places, childfree. Choose one, or write your own:

A candle store. I neeeeed more smelly candles.


And here's the last chance to make sure that you're not going to get a "Jelly of the Month" club membership when you're expecting your bonus for a swimming pool:

It is important to me that the items chosen for me _______________.


And

If I could suggest that you read only one post from my archives, this would be it: _____________________________

And

If I were to name the Holiday of my choice for this exchange, it would be: Christmas, of course!

Guilty

So, there is a study out there that says breast feeding your child can reduce the chance of her developing a sensitivity to gluten (Celiac disease) by up to 52%. You can read an article here. Anyways, I tend to take such findings with a grain of salt, but I cannot help but feel a little guilty. If I had successfully nursed Mary, would we be having all the problems with gluten that we are struggling with now? I just don't know. I guess there is no point in second guessing the decisions that I made back when breast feeding was such a nightmare for all of us, but it's hard not too.

New babies

Last night Ian, Mary and I finally got to see our friends new baby. Oh. My. God. She is so tiny! Mary was only that small when she was still inside of me (really, it's true). Tiny, beautiful and precious. It's amazing how different she looks than Mary did at that age too, Mary was all round and chubby, right from the begining, but this baby is all angles. She's got these giant hands on skinny wrists, and the thinnest little legs I've ever seen! When I held her, it was like I was holding nothing at all, she is so light. But she's beautiful, and the parents are doing so well, I'm just so happy for them.

I may have liked the baby, but Mary was not impressed in the least. She mostly ignored her, except when I was holding the baby, at which point Mary got extremely jealous, tried to climb into my lap, and when that didn't work, she attempted to hit the baby, shrieking the entire time. Yikes. Luckily Ian was right there to keep Mary away from the baby, and make sure she knew that we still love her.

Anyways, I must get a move on, today is our last music lesson, and I don't want to be late.

The Friendlies

 


Beijing has unveiled their mascots for the 2008 Olympics, they call them the Friendlies. They're kind of cute, in a creepy sort of way, and their names are neat. They are named Beibei (the fish), Jingjing (panda), Huanhuan (Olympic flame), Yingying (Tibetian Antelople), and Nini (Swallow). If you take the first sylable from each name, "Bei jing huan ing ni" it says "Welcome to Beijing." Honestly, I much prefer the Beijing mascots to the Vancouver Inukshuk, it's not cute at all, but a whole lot creepy and strange. Not to mention how upset the west coast natives are about the whole thing...why wouldn't they use a totem pole instead? I guess you just can't please everyone.

I've never really be into the Olympics. I enjoy watching some of the winter games, although it seems that the line between professional and amatuer sport is getting more and more blurry every year. I'm not olympic crazy like some people, but I do enjoy watching the world get together in relative peace. 

Friday Baby Blogging

 


We call her the "Big Red Blob" when she wears this snowsuit. 

Melodrama

You'd think that the 10 month old in the house would hold the title of "Drama Queen," but if you did, well, you'd be wrong. I've always been prone to melodrama, and although I have grown up an awful lot, it seems that I still have my moments. Ian came home from work and informed me that although the sink emptying onto the basement floor was bad, we would not end up living out of a shopping cart on 118th avenue by the end of the week. Thank God for him, really. If it werent for him, I'm sure that I would just be huddled up in a ball at the foot of the bed rocking. I am worried about when he goes out of time for work, who will calm me down? Who will keep me from over-reacting to just about everything? Who will keep me from seeing disaster in every day life?

This morning I'm watching the Food Network on TV. I watched it all day long, pretty much every day a year ago, when I was on bedrest, and I haven't watched it (except the occasional episode of Iron Chef) since Mary was born. It really is entertaining, although most of the recipies are far beyond me. Just now a woman made Creme Brulee (oh god, my mouth waters just typing the words), but really, who has a blow torch in their kitchen?? The only problem is that I get really hungry, and see all sorts of things that I don't see myself ever getting. Maybe when we get another house though, right now our kitchen is the size of your average bathroom. I have about a foot of counter space to work with, and any time I try to cook anything more complicated than rice, I end up getting extremely frustrated. I used to bake all the time, I loved to bake cookies, and occasionally I would bake bread, but not in this house. I'm going to have to borrow our neighbours kitchen for my cookie exchange and Marys birthday.

Uh Oh

Is it a bad thing when you drain your kitchen sink, and it all ends up on the basement floor?

We get something under control, and something else breaks, and this time we are in trouble, big trouble. We can't afford a plumber, not if we want to pay our mortgage and eat. I feel like I've been pulled under water, and someone is holding me there.

Why?

Why, oh why, does my child refuse to nap? WHY? Yes, she sleeps through the night for the most part, which makes us lucky, I know, but unless I stay up all night long cleaning the house, then I'm out of luck. The worst part is that she refuses to nap all day long, and by 5 in the evening, she's exhausted and miserable. Right now she is sitting in her crib, happily chatting away with her blanket. I know that she's tired, she knows she's tired, but still, she refuses to sleep. Well, I guess I had better go vacuum before the happy chatty turns into enraged screaming.

Oh, and in happier news...

Beaten by Technology

Beaten by Technology

Every morning I turn on the tube when I wake up and get my day started. Not because I want to watch anything in particular, but I like the voices in the background as I do other things like clean, read, cross stitch, feed the baby, blog...whatever. Anyways, I decided that this morning I would listen to talk radio instead. I really need to turn off the TV, those women on The View are starting to give me violent urges. So, I turned on the sterio (it's Ians) and got nothing but static. Simple, right? Just tune the radio to a station, and I should be good to go. It's much easier said than done. I could not figure out how to tune the bloody thing. I tried and tried, and eventually decided that Ian would be really angry if I smashed the stupid thing on the ground, and then jumped up and down on it. So I turned off the sterio, and turned on the tv. I'm going to have to chat with Ian about that tonight. This morning, Kelly Rippa compared the gangster turned rapper Fiddy Cent to the Beatles. Christ Almighty.

I'm still feeling a little pissy about loosing that post that I made on Saturday. I've been having a hard time even sitting down at the computer, I'm so angry with it. It was my fault, of course, but I prefer to blame my stupid mistakes on the machine.

Aside from the lost post, my weekend went quite well. Ian had to work on saturday (sigh), which made for a lonely day for me, but he did make money, which is nice. That afternoon I headed over to L & C's place downtown for some pre-Paradise Lost fun. What a beautiful appartament those people have. Bigger than my house, and not falling appart either! Anyways, after hanging out with the other Divine, we headed over to the game. Wow! Every time I go, I hurt just a little bit more. I can say from experience that playing infernal is much less painful, and a little more fun, but nowhere near as emotional! The game was great and horrifying, once again I came close to loosing my mind, or throwing up. Sunday Ian, Mary and I went shopping at Value Villiage, and then went to watch a football game with some friends who shall remain nameless. Edmonton played miserably, and lost horribly, but we were distracted by Marys antics. Saturday morning some other friends who prefer to remain nameless had their baby girl! I'm quite excited to meet the little one, but I have a bit of a sore throat, so it'll have to wait for a little while.

Disappointment

I had a huge post here, and I lost it. damn it. I'm not in the mood to re-write it right now, but needless to say, it was brilliant.

How Odd

Am I the only person who thinks this is really strange? On the news they interviewed one woman who puts her 10 month old baby on the potty every 20 minutes. Um...I'm sorry, I may be a stay at home Mum, but I do have a life.

Friday Baby Blogging

 


She just loves the camera. 

Conversations

So, last night I went to bed a little while after Ian did. Here is the conversation that we had...

Me: Hey, you asleep?

Ian: Nope.

Me: Well, I have to go to L & C's place on Saturday afternoon before the game.

Ian: Okay.

Me: They live on Bellamy Hill.

Ian: Heh. That's funny.

Me: Funny? Why?

Ian: We know a whole pile of people who live on Bellamy Hill.

Me: We do? Who?

Ian: Um...well...You know, people have pretty strict regulations, for their stuff.

Me: What?

Ian: I don't know. The city, it doesn't let just anyone, they have strict regulations. I lost my train of thought.

Me: What the hell are you talking about??

Ian: Well, the ceilings, they need steel supports. The steel supports are very important.

Me (finally cluing in, and giggling): Ah. Steel supports, eh?

Ian: Yeah, the ceilings need steel supports.

Me (Kicking Ian): You aren't awake, are you??

Ian: Huh? What?

It was extremely amusing, once I realised what the hell was going on. Of course, her rolled over and went back to sleep. Cori says that you can't die of insomnia, but I'm starting to believe otherwise.

In other news, Mary crawled up to me yesterday, pulled herself up on my knees, and said as clear as a bell "Up!" I swear to God, she said it. I got all excited, and tried to get her to say it again, and she has so far refused. Sigh.

Blame the mothers

When I go to a restaurant with my baby, I spend much of my time there stressing out about whether or not she will behave. Even if I am in a family restaurant with my child, I often feel extremely unwelcome. Not by the serving staff usually, but the other patrons will occasionally look at me and my baby like we have no right to be there. Most of the time I don't enjoy my dining experience, I'm too busy worrying about Mary, and about the other people in the restaurant. I mean, I try hard to be a good mother, but sometimes, my child gets cranky, and I'm certain it's going to get worse before it gets better. If we have ordered, our food is on the way, and my baby (or older child) gets crabby and whiney, am I required to get up and leave? Aren't family restaurants designed for families? I mean, I certainly won't be bringing Mary to The Keg for the next decade at least, but I really think that I should be able to go to a family restaurant with my family, and not feel bad if my baby cries. Certainly if, when she is older, if she gets up and tries to run around the restaurant I will deal with it, and punish her...but if she's just crabby and whiney, I don't know. I'll do what I can to hush her, but I'm not going to leave a meal that I have paid for. Anyways, that's what is on my mind today.

There seems to be a culture of "Blame the Mother" going on, and it is really starting to bother me. Being a Mum is hard work, and most of us do our best. Yes, there are bad mothers out there, I'm certainly arguing with that, but society seems to be pleased to put near impossible expectations on mothers. You need to be there for your children, but you should be working and bringing in an income too. You should breastfeed, but no one wants to see it, so don't do it in public. It's important to get out and run errands, but for heavens sake don't bring your crying baby, or crabby toddler, or whiney child out, we don't need to see that. Don't complain, you chose to do what you're doing. We can all talk about our jobs, but you cant, you're just a mother, no one wants to hear about it. Some once said to me "Boy, you talk about your baby a lot. Can't you talk about anything else?" Well...no, not really. I live with her, she is my job, 24 hours a day. I don't mind it, but why is it acceptable for you to complain or talk about your day in the office, but I'm being boring and selfish when I talk about my baby.

Christ, and now on "The View" (why oh why do I watch that show?) they are comparing smokers being allowed to smoke with crying children in public. If crying children are allowed in public, why shouldn't smokers be allowed to smoke in public. Jesus murphy.

Anyways, I seem to be crabby, and I'm not sure that I have expressed myself properly here, but I guess it's my blog, and I can be as disjointed and cranky as I wish. So there.

Oh, in other news, it looks like Ethiopia and Eritrea are possibly heading back to war. Lots of movement along the border, troops in the demilitarized zone, and Eritrea has banned UN movements there as well. It does look like the rioting has calmed in Addis though, possibly because today is a national Muslim holiday called Eid al Fitr (the end of Ramadan. I can't help but worry about my pen pal, Tigray is far from the Capital, but fairly close to the border with Eritrea I think.

Why democracy doesn't necessarily work for everyone

They are rioting in Addis Ababa, and people are being killed. I know it's nothing compared to what's going on in the Sudan (which by the way, rarely makes the news) but it's tough to hear about anyways. Most of you know what a soft spot I have for Ethiopia, I don't really understand it myself. Anyways, I have a little pen pal there, he doesn't live in the capital, so he should be safe, but I'm still worried about him. The BBC has a good article about what's happening over there, you can check it out here if you wish.

It's finished!

 


I've finally finished the cross stitched picture for Mary's Christmas stocking! All I have to do now is cut it out and attach the back. Yay! I'm really quite proud of myself, I have started a lot of projects in the past, and this is the first one I've actually finished!