Sunday, July 31, 2005

Seven Months

Today Mary is seven months old. Wow. I just cant believe how quickly time has flown by, and how much she has changed from the tiny creature we brought home in January.

I keep thinking about how lucky we are to have her in our lives. Not only does she bring an amazing amount of light into our lives, but she is a good baby too. She has slept through the night since she was 5 weeks old, she is always cheerful, and she loves people. She is very good at entertaining herself, so long as she is fed, her diaper is clean, and she gets cuddles every once in a while, she is happy to play on her own. I hear other people talk about all the work their babies have been, and I am thankful that Mary isn't like that.

Of course, not every day is smiles and chuckles. She gets cranky, and sometimes she is inconsolable. She is a constant source of worry for me...Why doesn't she crawl yet, why doesn't she have teeth, she's been sleeping for 12 hours now, is she still alive? Her skin, and constipation are a constant challenge, and it's difficult to find foods for her that wont make her skin even worse. It took months of work to get her to eat solids, and it is still touch and go. She is a lot of work, and it is hard to get anything done during the day, I cant imagine what it would be like with a more "difficult" baby.

We are getting to the time now that I have to think about going back to work, and it terrifies me. The thought of trusting someone else to raise her makes me sick, I just cant do it. I know how much work she takes, and I just cant imagine her getting the care and love she needs in a daycare where there are several other needy children, and workers who make barely more than minimum wage. I think that it is a terrible thing that our society makes it so difficult to be a parent and raise our children. There is all sorts of subsidies for daycares, in fact, they are revamping the daycare subsidy program as we speak to make it better, yet there is absolutely no help for parents who would rather raise their own children than go to work. The worst thing about me going back to work is that even if I go back to my old job and work full time, after the alarming cost for daycare I will be bringing home even less than I do now on Employment Insurance. Unfortunately, because Ian brings home more than $24,000 a year, we do not qualify for all those nifty subsidies. I would like to sit down with someone and find out how they expect a family whose income is $25,000/year to survive. It's almost worth it for us to just go on welfare, at least then we would have the help we need.

But I digress. Mary is 7 months, and time has flown by. She is a joy, and she learns new things every day. I cannot wait to see what else she learns to do, and what other surprises she brings into our lives.

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